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- The Dad-plomacy of 'No': Negotiations 101
The Dad-plomacy of 'No': Negotiations 101
Fresh and Interesting Ways to Say No Every Friday
they say patience is a virtue, and being a dad is proof of that
Good morning! You’ve found the ultimate guide to making "no" your go-to dad superpower. Whether your kids are throwing out wild ideas or just asking for more screen time, we’ve got the funniest ways to handle it all. Get ready for a laugh-filled ride through the art of dad-level refusals!
Before we get started, I want to ask your thoughts….
Reply and tell me if you (or real replies from your wife!) have better replies to any of these No’s.
Let’s get started!
FUNNY WAYS TO SAY NO
"Nope, I’m off-duty."
"I’ve already hit my weekly quota of doing things."
"I could, but I don’t want to."
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MORE PLAYFUL SONG/WORD-BASED WAYS USING 'NO'
"Another one says no!" (Tune: "Another One Bites the Dust" by Queen)
"Living on a no prayer." (Tune: "Livin’ on a Prayer" by Bon Jovi)
"It’s my no, and I’ll say it now!" (Tune: "It’s My Life" by Bon Jovi)
MORE SARCASTIC WAYS TO SAY NO
"Let me think about it... still no."
"Yeah, and I’ll paint the moon while I’m at it."
"Sure, as soon as I grow wings."
HOW WOULD MY WIFE REPLY?
"Nope, I’m off-duty."
Wife's Reply: "Oh, don’t worry, you’re getting drafted back on-duty immediately."
"I’ve already hit my weekly quota of doing things."
Wife's Reply: "Well, congratulations, you’re about to set a new record."
"I could, but I don’t want to."
Wife's Reply: "That’s fine. I’ll just start announcing how much I don’t want to cook dinner tonight."
"Another one says no!" (Tune: "Another One Bites the Dust" by Queen)
Wife's Reply: "And another one gets volunteered! Guess who?"
"Living on a no prayer." (Tune: "Livin’ on a Prayer" by Bon Jovi)
Wife's Reply: "Yeah, and the prayer is for you to get up and help. Start praying harder."
"It’s my no, and I’ll say it now!" (Tune: "It’s My Life" by Bon Jovi)
Wife's Reply: "That’s cute, but it’s my list and you’re doing it anyway."
"Let me think about it... still no."
Wife's Reply: "Perfect, that gives me time to think about how to make you do it anyway."
"Yeah, and I’ll paint the moon while I’m at it."
Wife's Reply: "Great! Start with the living room walls first, Picasso."
"Sure, as soon as I grow wings."
Wife's Reply: "Well, lucky for you, I’m about to clip those imaginary ones and get you grounded—now get moving."
WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE WAY TO SAY NO?
We want to hear from you!
Do you have a funny way that you have told your kids (or 🫣 your wife 🫣) the word “No”? Reply and let us know! We’ll add it to a future newsletter!
We Also Want To Hear Your Stories!
Have you said no recently in a funny way? Let us know how you said “No” and we’ll feature the best ones in our upcoming issues!
This is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to creative dad-denials. With each issue, we’ll bring you more funny ways to say "no," plus the wives’ quick-witted replies that always keep the humor rolling. Stay tuned for more dad-powered laughs ahead!
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